Molecular Love
Researchers at Pavia University in Italy have discovered that the powerful emotions bubbling in new lovers are triggered by a molecule known as nerve growth factor (NGF). Higher levels of NGF were detected in the blood of 58 people who had recently fallen madly in love than in that of a group of singles and people in long-term relationships. The problem is, however, that after a year these higher levels fall to the same level found in all other groups.
So now science has discovered something parents have been trying to tell their teenagers for ages: there is a difference between infatuation and real love. Infatuation is “love at first sight;” authentic love develops gradually and deepens with each experience. Infatuation is selfish and characterized by immediate gratification; authentic love is directed toward the other person and is patient. Infatuation is centered on physical attraction; while physical attraction is involved in authentic love, the real connection is more than skin-deep. Infatuation is romantic and refuses to face reality; authentic love does not ignore reality but rather enhances it.
Jesus taught a love that rises above the molecular level to soar at spiritual heights. It is not based on emotions, for emotions wear thin. It is found in relationships that begin with first dates, warm feelings, and butterflies in the stomach. It follows married couples on their honeymoon. But it is also around when the baby is burning up with a fever in the middle of the night, or when the budget gets tight, or when the other person has to put in long hours at the office, or when it’s time to celebrate fifty years of marriage. Christian love is able to break through the initial romance and grow into something more permanent.
Paul writes, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Cor. 13:4-7).
Young people, give your relationships some time. Don’t rush into marriage over the first person that makes your heart flutter. Newlyweds, don’t be alarmed when you find that marriage is not as romantic as you thought it would be. Romance fades, but love lasts. And that’s the way it should be, for love is better. It is “the greatest of these” (1 Cor. 13:13).
